Guest Post: Navigating Self-Care While Caring for a Special Needs Child: A Compassionate Guide 

Navigating Self-Care While Caring for a Special Needs Child: A Compassionate Guide 

by Amanda Henderson

Photo by nappy on Pexels.com

Welcome to Thurrock Muslim Community! 

Caring for a child with special needs brings its own set of unique challenges and joys. It’s a demanding role that requires endless dedication and love. But while focusing on the needs of the child, it’s crucial not to neglect oneself. In the spirit of sustaining one’s emotional, mental, and physical well-being, this guide by Amanda Henderson (Safe Children) aims to provide actionable steps to help parents establish a self-care plan that can serve them well in the long run. 

Identify the Root of Fatigue 

The weariness that comes with caregiving often has several contributors, from sleep deprivation to emotional stress. Identifying these triggers is the first crucial step in tackling fatigue. Healthline points out that understanding the root cause of exhaustion can provide an avenue for seeking specific remedies or adjustments to your routine. 

Tune Into Your Body 

Before exhaustion leads to burnout, it’s essential to listen to your body. BetterUp notes that developing mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing exercises, can help in becoming aware of fatigue levels throughout the day. These practices provide an opportunity for checking in with oneself, thus helping to prevent physical and emotional exhaustion from setting in. 

Read Supplications/ Dua’s for easing anxiety ThurrockMuslims.com

Keep a Clean and Organized Home 

A clutter-free environment often equates to a stress-free mind. Focus on keeping your living spaces, especially children’s bedrooms and playrooms, organized and clean. Simplifying cleaning routines or using easily manageable storage solutions can make this task less daunting. A clean home can work wonders in lowering stress levels, contributing to a healthier emotional state. 

Rekindle Professional Aspirations 

Investing time in professional endeavours, like launching a small business, can act as a positive counterbalance to the emotional toll of caregiving. Research various business formation services thoroughly before diving in — plus, create a robust business plan and understand the rudiments of marketing. Learn the basics of setting up a company structure. A constructive diversion like this can rejuvenate your spirit and provide a sense of accomplishment. 

Read Introduction to Islam by ThurrockMuslims.com

Set Personal Goals 

Goal-setting can serve as a motivational tool, giving parents a measurable way to track their progress and celebrate achievements. Goals don’t have to be monumental; they can be simple targets like taking a walk three times a week or reading a book every month. Setting realistic and achievable milestones contributes to improving your quality of life. 

Practice Self-Care 

Amid the demands of caregiving, carving out “me time” is imperative. Whether it’s a simple bubble bath, a brief morning jog, or even a hobby you love, find what brings you peace and make time for it. Different self-care strategies appeal to different people; the key is to find what rejuvenates you and make it a part of your routine. 

Take a Walk 

Taking a walk in an area with a high Walk Score can offer numerous benefits for individuals and communities alike. It promotes physical health by encouraging regular exercise and reducing the reliance on cars, leading to improved cardiovascular health and weight management. Additionally, it enhances mental well-being by providing opportunities for relaxation, stress reduction, and social interaction with neighbours, thereby fostering a sense of belonging and community cohesion.  

A high Walk Score area often signifies easy access to essential services, businesses, and public transportation, reducing commuting time and expenses, as well as decreasing traffic congestion and air pollution. Furthermore, it supports local economies by boosting foot traffic for businesses and contributing to a vibrant urban environment.  

Look for More Flexible Work 

The nature of your job can profoundly affect your caregiving experience. If possible, consider jobs that offer more flexible hours or work-from-home options. It’s a significant change that comes with its own set of advantages and disadvantages, but for many, the pros outweigh the cons, especially when it helps balance the challenges of caregiving and self-care. 

Seek Professional Help if Necessary 

At times, despite best efforts, external intervention becomes necessary. Be vigilant about recognizing signs of emotional exhaustion or severe stress, as they may indicate the need for professional assistance. Whether it’s a counselor or a medical specialist, knowing when and how to seek help can make a meaningful difference. 

Taking care of oneself is not a luxury but a necessity, particularly when you are responsible for a child with special needs. The actionable steps outlined in this guide aim to help parents create a self-care plan that is sustainable and well-suited to their unique challenges. After all, a happier, healthier you will undoubtedly result in a more enriching caregiving experience for your child. 

Written by Amanda Henderson, Safe Children USA 

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THE SACRED MONTHS-Ramadan in under 2 Months! Rajab


THE SACRED MONTHS – RAJAB 1445AH


Asalamu alaykum dear readers.

We are now in the sacred month of Rajab walhamdulillah and  we would like to remind ourselves about the importance of the four sacred months in Islam. Rajab is the 7th month of the Islamic calendar. The sacred months are are Rajab, Dhul Qad’ah, Dhul Hijjah and Muharram, the 7th, 11th, 12th and 1st month of the Islamic Hijri calander respectively. (see Surah Tawbah, Qur’an chapter 9 verse 36).

Watch this video on what to do in Rajab and other sacred months, Sheikh Assim Al Hakim explains:

(We should be extra careful not to sin, all the time, but particularly in the sacred months, and avoid aggression…also a word on Isra’ wal Miraaj and religious innovations/bid’ah…and the importance of holding on to the Sunnah of Rasoolullah peace be upon him)

May Allah forgive us, be merciful to us and guide us, for He is the Most Gracious the Most Merciful, The Ever-Relenting. May Allah enable us to witness and observe many Ramadans in His obedience, with sincerity and strength. May Allah unite us in jannat al firdaus. Allah bless His final messenger Muhammad ibn Abdillah in abundance. Amin

Please keep us in duas and support our work. Help us keep this going in sha Allah.

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Rajab 1445ah

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How to perform UMRAH- cartoon video

How to perform UMRAH- cartoon video

Labbayk Allahumma labbayk!

How to wear Ihram for men

Demonstration by author Ustadh Ismail Davids.

Pray for us, pretty please 😀

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How to Perform Wudu (Ablution)-Fiqh of Taharah

How to Perform Wudu (Ablution)-Fiqh of Taharah

Let’s learn together 🙂

How to perform wudu/ablution

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KNOWLEDGE IS LIGHT- LESSON 3 PART 1

Bismillah, walhamdulillah, wasalatu wassalaam alaa rasoolillah!

Asalamu alaykum!

Welcome to lesson 3, part 1!

Previously, we discussed the antithesis of Tawheed, namely ‘Shirk’ (see the previous lesson) and it’s categories. 

Shirk is the biggest sin Allah won’t forgive! May Allah protect us!

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Do you remember the categories of Tawheed (see part 2, part 3, part 4 of lesson 1) ?  Also check out the categories of Shirk...


Taqwa, Saints and Graves.


Taqwa means to be concious and aware of Allah (The One True God), in all that we do.  We fear and love and hope in Allah. It is the driving force behind living faith. The higher our level of taqwa, the higher our faith and rank.

We can’t claim piety or sainthood/wali for ourselves or others. Only Allah knows who is truly pious. The criterion for divine friendship/walaya (to be of the close friends of Allah) is having iman (faith) and Taqwa (God-conciousness). We cannot designate ourselves or others as such (i.e. wali), as this is decided by Allah, He knows the hearts and the true piety within.

No so-called saint, dead or alive, can give you anything, nor can they benefit or harm. Allah alone is the true Provider and He alone controls the universe.

Grave worship, that is visiting the graves of the desceased to ask them for something or similar, is a huge sin. If we ask, we should ask from Allah alone, for Allah is The Ever-Living, He never dies and He is the Provider, The Rich.

The practice of visiting graves of “saints”/”pirs” or “walis” and praying to them is a serious crime and a form of shirk (the biggest sin Allah won’t forgive).

May Allah protect us from all types of shirk! May Allah, The One, The Compeller, grant us perfect Tawheed for His sake alone forever! May Allah forgive us for any error. Allahumma salli alaa Muhammad Sallallahu alayhi wasallam. ameen!

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Foundations of Faith Are Number 1- Sheikh Salih al-Fawzan

Foundations of Faith Are Number 1

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Muharram 1445AH – Ashura fasting 10th Muharram on 28Jul-2023- ThurrockMuslims.com-


MUHARRAM 1445AH– NEW YEAR Hijri Calender


Asalaamu alaykum Dear readers,

We are now in the first month of Hijri year 1445, Muharram.

**Scroll down for Ashura dates and fasting reminders**

Fasting dates:

9th Muharram- 27 Jul-2023

10th Muharram – Ashura fasting on Mon 28 Jul -2023

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Muharram is a month of great virtue. It is of the four sacred months out of twelve months in the Islamic calendar.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Verily, the number of months with Allaah is twelve months (in a year), so was it ordained by Allaah on the Day when He created the heavens and the earth; of them four are Sacred (i.e. the 1st, the 7th, the 11th and the 12th months of the Islamic calendar). That is the right religion, so wrong not yourselves therein”

[al-Tawbah 9:36]

Allah, The Almighty, has made it a sacred month of great virtue. May He allow us to abstain from sins, to turn to Him in repentance, and to run back to Him with good deeds, for verily, the good deeds remove the evil deeds.

And Allah is The Most Generous. Oh Allah we ask for Your peace and blessings upon The final prophet Muhammad peace be upon him. Ameen ya Rabb al ‘aalameen.

It is encouraged to fast in Muharram, particularly the 10th (Ashoora’), and the preceding day with it (9th/ Tasooaa’). Let us take advantage of these beautiful  days, in sha Allah.

It was proven from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) that the best fasting after Ramadaan is fasting in the month of Muharram.

It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The best fasting after Ramadaan is the month of Allaah Muharram, and the best prayer after the obligatory prayer is prayer at night.” Narrated by Muslim, 1163. 

**Ashura dates and fasting reminders**

Regarding the significance of fasting on Ashoora’ :

The reason why the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) fasted on the day of ‘Ashoora’ and urged the people to do likewise is mentioned in the hadeeth narrated by al-Bukhaari (1865) from Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him), who said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) came to Madeenah and saw the Jews fasting on the day of ‘Ashoora’. He said, “What is this?” They said, “This is a good day, this is the day when Allaah saved the Children of Israel from their enemy and Moosa fasted on this day.” He (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, “We are closer to Moosa than you.” So he fasted on this day and told the people to fast. 

Fasting the day of ‘Ashoora’ does expiate (minor sins) for the past year, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Fasting the day of ‘Arafah I hope Allaah will expiate thereby for the year before it and the year after it, and fasting the day of ‘Ashoora’  I hope Allaah will expiate thereby for the year that came before it.” Narrated by Muslim, 1162.

‘Abd-Allaah ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: When the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) fasted on the day of ‘Ashoora and told the people to fast, they said, “O Messenger of Allaah, this is a day that is venerated by the Jews and Christians.” The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said, “Next year, if Allaah wills, we will fast on the ninth day.” But by the time the following year came, the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) had passed away.

 Narrated by Muslim, 1916.

It is expected that 9th Muharram 1445 will coincide with 27th July 2023  and 28th Aug 2023 will be the 10th, or Ashoora’. May Allah grant us sincerity and the ability to seize the opportunity this Ashoora’ by fasting to gain His reward, love and forgiveness, through implementing the Sunnah of His final messenger Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wasallam. Ameen

With love for the sake of Allah

Thurrock Muslim Community

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Muharram 1445AH

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EID PRAYER GRAYS MOSQUE/THURROCK 2023- EID UL ADHAA 1444AH 28th June 2023 (males and females welcome) updated MORE LOCATIONS- GRAYS, TILBURY, OCKENDON, BASILDON, C100


EID PRAYER GRAYS MOSQUE/THURROCK 2023- EID UL ADHAA 1444AH Wednesday 28th June2023 (males and females welcome)

(males and females welcome)


Asalamu alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh!

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EID MUBARAK!

Taqaballallaahu minaa wa minkum! May Allah accept (good deeds) from us and from you. ameen

(Adhere to covid19 guidelines- masks, own mats, bags, wash hands. Wudu from home)

EID PRAYERS IN GRAYS and surrounding areas ** SEE BELOW

We are still witnessing the best 10 days of the year, Alhamdulillah. Allah, The Self-Sufficient, The Most Generous, has honoured us with Islam and Iman, and before us we have a magnificent festival, Eid-ul-Adha, The festival of Sacrifice, on the 10th day of this sacred month of Dhul-Hijjah 1444. Let us congratulate one another on this joyous occasion.

May Allah accept (good deeds) from us and from you. ameen

ALERT -GRAYS /THURROCK EID PRAYER ANNOUNCEMENT BELOW*:

GRAYS MOSQUE TEMPORARILY CLOSED FOR REFURB. ALTERNATIVE EID PRAYER ARRANGEMENTS, SEE BELOW -MEN and women

IMPORTANT- EID PRAYER ANNOUNCEMENT 10 DHUL HIJJAH 1444

EID PRAYER TO BE HELD AT Park near GRAYS MOSQUE IN SHA ALLAH,  

Eid Jamath time: 9:30am men only, bring own mat, do wudu at home.

DIRECTIONS: Grays Mosque (Thurrock Islamic Education & Cultural Association), Park Way Centre, Park Road, Thurrock, Grays, Essex, RM17 6RB (minutes walk away from Morrisons shopping centre and Grays train/bus station.)

TALEEM MOSQUE, GRAYS EID ARRANGEMENTS- WOMEN INCLUDED, THURROCK AND SURROUNDING AREAS730am, 830am, 930AM AND 1030AM ,4 JAMAT, FOR MEN WOMEN AND KIDS, 21 Clarence Road, RM17 6QA (new masjid, ma sha Allah)

DO NOT PARK IN THE JOB CENTRE CAR PARK. PLEASE USE NEARBY PAID PARKING ON ROADS/SUPERMARKETS/SHOPPING CENTRE CAR PARKS. LET’S BE KIND TO OUR NEIGHBOURS 🙂

Taleem Institute Eid jamat x4 – men, women, kids– PLEASE ARRIVE 30 MINS BEFORE JAMAT.

Assalamu Alaykum,

We are pleased to announce that we will be holding 4 Eid Prayers at Taleem Centre InshaAllah.

Due to Eid being on weekday, Taleem Mosque will not have any car parking facilities as it will be used by the Job Centre. Please park safely nearby i.e Morrison/side roads pay & display.

Open to all brothers, sisters and children – please bring along your family to pray together (segregated floor for women)

We are looking forward to seeing you all InshaAllah

Taleem Mosque

21 Clarence Road, RM17 6QA

EID AT STIFFORD HOTEL -OUTDOOR

Eid Jamath: 915am, Stifford Hotel, High Rd, Grays, RM16 5UE.

Please pay for parking upon arrival. BRING A PRAYER MAT

Tilbury Masjid(RM18 8LJ)

Tilbury Masjid Address:-

8am men only

930am men only

11am men and women

159 St. Chad’s Road, Tilbury. Essex. RM18 8LJ

Other arrangements

BASILDON Eid salah- SEIT- 8am jamah all welcome

8am- only 1 jamah

Address:

BASILDON POST OFFICE SOCIAL CLUB

GARDINERS WAY

GARDINERS LANE SOUTH

BASILDON

ESSEX

SS14 3UJ

Please bring a mat, come with wudu. Parking slots will be allocated.

IMPORTANT:

Please take a few moments for the sake of Allah to discover the obligations, sunnahs and etiquettes of Eid-ul-adhaa:

The etiquettes of Eid, the takbeer etc.

Udhiyah- animal of an’aam class (either sheep,camel, cow etc.) offered as a sacrifice as an act of worship to Allah, The Self-Sufficient Provider.

HOW TO PRAY EID PRAYER HERE

Some top tips (see above links for references from Qur’an and sunnah):

1- Do make an arrangement immediately to offer the udhiyah, if you have not done so already. You can do it with various Islamic charities in the UK, in sha Allah. Let us offer sacrificial animals in obedience to Allah, following the way of His final prophet Muhammad peace be upon him. Let’s share this bounty with our brothers and sisters around the world, in sha Allah!

2- Keep pronouncing the Takbeer, this is a great Sunnah! Remind each other! (starts on 1st Dhul Hijjah until sunset on the last of the days of Tashreeq, i.e. 13th Dhul Hijjah. Also read the takbeer after the obligatory prayers, starting from after Fajr on the 9th of Dhul Hijjah to after Asr on 13th of Dhul Hijjah.)

The Takbeer is:

Allahu Akbar, Allahu akbar, Allahu Akbar, laa ilaha illAllah, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, wa lillaahilHamd. (Allah is Most Great, Allah is Most Great, Allah is Most Great, There is no true god worthy of worship, except Allah. Allah is Most Great, Allah is Most Great, Allah is Most Great and all praise be to Allah.)

الله اكبر، الله اكبر، الله اكبر، لا إله الا الله، الله اكبر، الله اكبر، ولله الحمد

3-Have ghusl in the morning before going out to pray

4- If possible, make an effort to delay eating until after the Eid salah and eat from the udhiyah if you offered a sacrifice.

5- Men should go out wearing their finest clothes, perfume etc.When going out or in the presence of non-mahram men, women should avoid perfume. Women can wear their fine clothes so long as it is concealed by a full and complete, unadorned Hijab. When in female only environments, or among their mahram relatives, women may adorn themselves appropriately. My dear readers, let us remind ourselves that obedience to Allah takes precedence over all else.

6- Pray the Eid prayer in congregation

7- Congratulate one another! Taqabbal Allahu minnaa wa minkum (May Allah accept (the fast and worship) from us and from you)

8- Go out to pray one route, and return by another. Check out the links above for more!

9-Keep up with the abundant dhikr, this last of the ten best days of the year!!!

say: Subhanallah, Alhamdulillah, wa laa ilaha illAllah, wallahuakbar!

Let’s send salutations on the final prophet of Allah, Muhammad Sallallahu alayhi wasallam!

Jazakallah khair everyone who helped organise, and those who informed us, May Allah elevate you  us and our families.

Pray for us and share for the sake of Allah!

May Allah forgive us, for He is the Perpetual Forgiver and may Allah guide us to unite upon belief in His Oneness. Allahumma salli wasallim alaa nabiyinaa muhammad salllallahu alayhi wasallam. ameen

Thurrock Muslim Community

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Best Ten Days of the Year…6 Things You Need to Know NOW-Hajj 2023/1444ah

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, The Most Merciful


Best Ten Days of the Year…6 Things You Need to Know NOW


Before Dhul Hijjah starts (in a few days), let’s get prepared. Find out about sacrifice/udhiyah/qurbani, Hajj, virtuous deeds, fasting and fasting on the day of Arafah, the takbeer, and much more!

Keep us in your duas, especially those going for Hajj 🙂

Virtues of the Ten Days of Dhul Hijjah


How do the first ten days of the Month of Dhul Hijjah differ from other days of the year?

Adapted from Sheikh Salih Al Munajjid, IslamQA.info

Praise be to Allaah Who has created Time and has made some times better than others, some months and days and nights better than others, when rewards are multiplied many times, as a mercy towards His slaves. This encourages them to do more righteous deeds and makes them more eager to worship Him, so that the Muslim renews his efforts to gain a greater share of reward, prepare himself for death and supply himself in readiness for the Day of Judgement

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This season of worship brings many benefits, such as the opportunity to correct one’s faults and make up for any shortcomings or anything that one might have missed. Every one of these special occasions involves some kind of worship through which the slaves may draw closer to Allaah, and some kind of blessing though which Allaah bestows His favour and mercy upon whomsoever He will. The happy person is the one who makes the most of these special months, days and hours and draws nearer to his Lord during these times through acts of worship; he will most likely be touched by the blessing of Allaah and will feel the joy of knowing that he is safe from the flames of Hell. (Ibn Rajab, al-Lataa’if, p.8)

The Muslim must understand the value of his life, increase his worship of Allaah and persist in doing good deeds until the moment of death. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And worship your Lord until there comes unto you the certainty.” [al-Hijr 15:99]

The mufassireen (commentators) said: “‘The certainty’ means death.”

Among the special seasons of worship are the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, which Allaah has preferred over all the other days of the year. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him and his father) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There are no days in which righteous deeds are more beloved to Allaah than these ten days.” The people asked, “Not even jihaad for the sake of Allaah?” He said, “Not even jihaad for the sake of Allaah, except in the case of a man who went out to fight giving himself and his wealth up for the cause, and came back with nothing.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 2/457).

Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him and his father) also reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There is no deed more precious in the sight of Allaah, nor greater in reward, than a good deed done during the ten days of Sacrifice.” He was asked, “Not even jihaad for the sake of Allaah?” He said, “Not even jihaad for the sake of Allaah, except in the case of a man who went out to fight giving himself and his wealth up for the cause, and came back with nothing.” (Reported by al-Daarimi, 1/357; itsisnaad is hasan as stated in al-Irwaa’, 3/398).

These texts and others indicate that these ten days are better than all the other days of the year, with no exceptions, not even the last ten days of Ramadaan. But the last ten nights of Ramadaan are better, because they include Laylat al-Qadr (“the Night of Power”), which is better than a thousand months. Thus the various reports may be reconciled. (See Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 5/412).

orange tiles

You should know, my brothers and sisters in Islaam, that the virtue of these ten days is based on many things:

  1. Allaah swears an oath by them, and swearing an oath by something is indicative of its importance and great benefit. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “By the dawn; by the ten nights” [al-Fajr 89:1-2]. Ibn ‘Abbaas, Ibn al-Zubayr, Mujaahid and others of the earlier and later generations said that this refers to the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah. Ibn Katheer said: “This is the correct opinion.” (Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 8/413)

2. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) testified that these are the best days of this world, as we have already quoted above from saheeh ahaadeeth.

3.The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) encouraged people to do righteous deeds because of the virtue of this season for people throughout the world, and also because of the virtue of the place – for the Hujjaaj (pilgrims) to the Sacred House of Allaah.

4.The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded us to recite a lot of Tasbeeh (“Subhan-Allaah“),Tahmeed (“Al-hamdu Lillaah“) and Takbeer (“Allaahu akbar“) during this time. ‘Abdullaah ibn ‘Umar (may Allaah be pleased with him and his father) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “There are no days greater in the sight of Allaah and in which righteous deeds are more beloved to Him than these ten days, so during this time recite a great deal of Tahleel (“La ilaaha ill-Allaah“), Takbeerand Tahmeed.” (Reported by Ahmad, 7/224; Ahmad Shaakir stated that it is saheeh).

5.These ten days include Yawm ‘Arafaah (the Day of ‘Arafaah), on which Allaah perfected His Religion. Fasting on this day will expiate for the sins of two years. These days also includeYawm al-Nahar (the Day of Sacrifice), the greatest day of the entire year and the greatest day of Hajj, which combines acts of worship in a way unlike any other day.

6.These ten days include the days of sacrifice and of Hajj.

Question: What must the Muslim avoid during these ten days if he wants to offer a sacrifice?

The Sunnah indicates that the one who wants to offer a sacrifice must stop cutting his hair and nails and removing anything from his skin, from the beginning of the ten days until after he has offered his sacrifice, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “When you see the new moon of Dhu’l-Hijjah, if any one of you wants to offer a sacrifice, then he should stop cutting his hair and nails until he has offered his sacrifice.” According to another report he said: “He should not remove (literally, touch) anything from his hair or skin.” (reported by Muslim with four isnaads, 13/146)

The Prophet’s instruction here makes one thing obligatory and his prohibition makes another haraam, according to the soundest opinion, because these commands and prohibitions are unconditional and unavoidable. However, if a person does any of these things deliberately, he must seek Allaah’s forgiveness but is not required to offer (an extra) sacrifice in expiation; his sacrifice will be acceptable. Whoever needs to remove some hair, nails, etc. because it is harming him, such as having a broken nail or a wound in a site where there is hair, should do so, and there is nothing wrong with that. The state of ihraam is so important that it is permitted to cut one’s hair if leaving it will cause harm. There is nothing wrong with men or women washing their heads during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) only forbade cutting the hair, not washing it.

The wisdom behind this prohibition of the one who wants to offer a sacrifice from cutting his hair etc., is so that he may resemble those in ihraam in some aspects of the rituals performed, and so that he may draw closer to Allaah by offering the sacrifice. So he leaves his hair and nails alone until the time when he has offered his sacrifice, in the hope that Allaah will save him in his entirety from the Fire. And Allaah knows best.

If a person has cut his hair or nails during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah because he was not planning to offer a sacrifice, then he decides later, during the ten days, to offer a sacrifice, then he must refrain from cutting his hair and nails from the moment he makes this decision.

Some women may delegate their brothers or sons to make the sacrifice on their behalf, then cut their hair during these ten days. This is not correct, because the ruling applies to the one who is offering the sacrifice, whether or not he (or she) delegates someone else to carry out the actual deed. The prohibition does not apply to the person delegated, only to the person who is making the sacrifice, as is indicated in the hadeeth. The person who is sacrificing on behalf of someone else, for whatever reason, does not have to adhere to this prohibition.

This prohibition appears to apply only to the one who is offering the sacrifice, not to his wife and children, unless any of them is offering a sacrifice in his or her own right, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to sacrifice “on behalf of the family of Muhammad,” but there are no reports that say he forbade them to cut their hair or nails at that time.

If a person was planning to offer a sacrifice, then he decides to go and perform Hajj, he should not cut his hair or nails if he wants to enter ihraam, because the Sunnah is only to cut hair and nails when necessary. But if he is performing Tamattu’ [whereby he performs ‘Umrah, comes out of ihraam and enters ihraam anew for Hajj], he should trim his hair at the end of his ‘Umrah because this is part of the ritual.

The things that are described above as being prohibited for the person who is planning to offer a sacrifice are reported in the hadeeth quoted above; the person is not forbidden to wear perfume, have marital relations, wear sewn garments, etc.

Concerning the types of worship to be performed during these ten days: one must understand that these days are a great blessing from Allaah to His slave, which is appreciated properly by the actively righteous. It is the Muslim’s duty to appreciate this blessing and make the most of the opportunity, by devoting these ten days to paying more attention to striving hard in worship. Among His blessings to His slaves, Allaah has given us many ways in which to do good and worship Him, so that the Muslim may be constantly active and consistent in his worship of his Lord.

Among the good deeds which the Muslim should strive to do during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah are:

  1. Fasting. It is Sunnah to fast on the ninth day of Dhu’l-Hijjah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) urged us to do good deeds during this time, and fasting is one of the best of deeds. Allaah has chosen fasting for Himself, as is stated in the hadeeth qudsi: “Allaah says: ‘All the deeds of the son of Adam are for him, except for fasting, which is for Me and I am the One Who will reward him for it.’” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 1805).

    The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)
     used to fast on the ninth of Dhu’l-Hijjah. Hunaydah ibn Khaalid reported from his wife that some of the wives of the Prophet(peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to fast on the ninth of Dhu’l-Hijjah, on the day of ‘Aashooraa’, on three days of each month, and on the first two Mondays and Thursdays of each month.” (Reported by al-Nisaa’i, 4/205 and by Abu Dawud; classified by al-Albaani as saheeh in Saheeh Abi Dawud, 2/462).
  2. Takbeer. It is Sunnah to say Takbeer (“Allaahu akbar“),Tahmeed (“Al-hamdu Lillaah“), Tahleel (“La ilaha ill-Allaah“) and Tasbeeh (“Subhaan Allaah“) during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, and to say it loudly in the mosque, the home, the street and every place where it is permitted to remember Allaah and mention His name out loud, as an act of worship and as a proclamation of the greatness of Allaah, may He be exalted.Men should recite these phrases out loud, and women should recite them quietly.

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“That they might witness things that are of benefit to them (i.e., reward of Hajj in the Hereafter, and also some worldly gain from trade, etc.), and mention the name of Allaah on appointed days, over the beast of cattle that He has provided for them (for sacrifice)…” [al-Hajj 22:28]

The majority of scholars agree that the “appointed days” are the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, because of the words of Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him and his father): “The ‘appointed days’ are the first ten days (of Dhu’l-Hijjah).”
The Takbeer may include the words Allaahu akbar, Allaahu akbar, la ilaaha ill-Allaah; wa Allaahu akbar wa Lillaahi’l-hamd(Allaah is Most Great, Allaah is Most Great, there is no god but Allaah; Allaah is Most Great and to Allaah be praise),” as well as other phrases.
Takbeer at this time is an aspect of the Sunnah that has been forgotten, especially during the early part of this period, so much so that one hardly ever hears Takbeer, except from a few people. This Takbeer should be pronounced loudly, in order to revive the Sunnah and as a reminder to the negligent. There is sound evidence that Ibn ‘Umar and Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with them) used to go out in the marketplace during the first ten days of Dhu’l-Hijjah, reciting Takbeer, and the people would recite Takbeer when they heard them. The idea behind reminding the people to recite Takbeer is that each one should recite it individually, not in unison, as there is no basis in Sharee’ah for doing this.

Reviving aspects of the Sunnah that have been virtually forgotten is a deed that will bring an immense reward, as is indicated by the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Whoever revives an aspect of my Sunnah that is forgotten after my death, he will have a reward equivalent to that of the people who follow him, without it detracting in the least from their reward.” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi, 7/443; this is a hasan hadeeth because of corroborating asaaneed).

3. Performing Hajj and ‘Umrah. One of the best deeds that one can do during these ten days is to perform Hajj to the Sacred House of Allaah. The one whom Allaah helps to go on Hajj to His House and to perform all the rituals properly is included in the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “An accepted Hajj brings no less a reward than Paradise.

4.Doing more good deeds in general, because good deeds are beloved by Allaah and will bring a great reward from Him. Whoever is not able to go to Hajj should occupy himself at this blessed time by worshipping Allaah, praying (salaat), reading Qur’an, remembering Allaah, making supplication (du’aa’), giving charity, honouring his parents, upholding the ties of kinship, enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil, and other good deeds and acts of worship.

5.Sacrifice. One of the good deeds that will bring a person closer to Allaah during these ten days is offering a sacrifice, by choosing a high-quality animal and fattening it, spending money for the sake of Allaah. 

6. Sincere repentance. One of the most important things to do during these ten days is to repent sincerely to Allaah and to give up all kinds of disobedience and sin. Repentance means coming back to Allaah and foregoing all the deeds, open and secret, that He dislikes, out of regret for what has passed, giving it up immediately and being determined never to return to it, but to adhere firmly to the Truth by doing what Allaah loves.

If a Muslim commits a sin, he must hasten to repent at once, without delay, firstly because he does not know when he will die, and secondly because one evil deed leads to another.

Repentance at special times is very important because in most cases people’s thoughts turn towards worship at these times, and they are keen to do good, which leads to them recognizing their sins and feeling regret for the past. Repentance is obligatory at all times, but when the Muslim combines sincere repentance with good deeds during the days of most virtue, this is a sign of success, in sha Allaah. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “But as for him who repented, believed and did righteous deeds, then he will be among those who are successful.” [al-Qasas 28:67]

The Muslim should make sure that he does not miss any of these important occasion, because time is passing quickly. Let him prepare himself by doing good deeds which will bring him reward when he is most in need of it, for no matter how much reward he earns, he will find it is less than he needs; the time of departure is at hand, the journey is frightening, delusions are widespread, and the road is long, but Allaah is ever watchful, and to Him will we return and render account. As the Qur’aan says (interpretation of the meaning):

“So whosoever does good equal to the weight of an atom, shall see it,

And whosoever does evil equal to the weight of an atom, shall see it.”

[Qur’an , al-Zalzalah 99:7-8]

There is much to be gained, so make the most of the opportunity afforded by these invaluable and irreplaceable ten days. Hasten to do good works, before death strikes, before one can regret one’s negligence and failure to act, before one is asked to return to a place where no prayers will be answered, before death intervenes between the hopeful one and the things he hopes for, before you are trapped with your deeds in the grave.

Expose yourself to the gentle breeze of your Lord’s mercy during these ten days, for Allaah will cause this breeze to touch whomever He wills, and whoever is touched by it will be happy on the Day of Judgement. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad and all his Family and Companions.

May Allah the Most Merciful, The Real Bestower help us to implement beneficial knowledge for His pleasure alone. ameen.

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THURROCK COMMUNITY IFTAR 7 APRIL 2023- TALEEM FOUNDATION

THURROCK COMMUNITY IFTAR 7 APRIL 2023- TALEEM FOUNDATION

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